I remember my first senior leadership role.
I was excited. Not because of the title—but because of what it meant. It felt like a new beginning. It felt like everything I had worked for was finally paying off.

I remember looking at the offer and thinking… this changes things.

This means I can provide differently.
This means I can build something better.

This means everything I’ve been working toward is starting to come together.

And not once did I ask the question I should have asked:

Why?

Why this role? Why this urgency? Why me? And more importantly… what am I walking into?

I didn’t ask for enough details.

I just said yes.

Because I was grateful. Because I was excited. Because I believed this was the next step.

And then I got there.

And within the first week, I remember thinking:

What the hell were you thinking?

I walked into a team that was completely broken.

Most of them were new. Most of them didn’t know workforce. The people who did? They had already quit. The previous leader had walked out—and the entire team followed.

The systems weren’t set up. The schedules were wrong. The client wasn’t happy. Workforce was being blamed for everything.

And this was my first senior leadership role.

First time leading everything.
First time managing globally.
First time leading remote teams.

No processes. No structure. No support.

Just me.

I remember going home every day… and crying.

I was alone. In a new city. With no support system. No one who knew me. No one who really cared about me.

And for the first time, I had to admit something to myself:

I didn’t know what I was doing.

So I did what I’ve always done.

I figured it out.

I started reading. Learning. Talking to people. Trying things. Failing. Fixing. Adjusting.

Brick by brick… I built that team.

I stood in front and took the hits.

I absorbed the pressure.

And then I went back and worked with them—side by side.

They didn’t realize it at the time… but I was learning just as much as they were.

That experience showed me my flaws.

It showed me where I needed to grow.

But more importantly…

it showed me who I was as a leader.

I realized something in that season.

My purpose was never about the title.

It was never about recognition.

It was about people.

Helping them grow.
Helping them see more in themselves.
Helping them build something they didn’t think they could.

And when everything was said and done…

I wasn’t the most proud of the results.

I was proud of them.

Who they became.
How they grew.
What we built together.

That team didn’t just grow because of me.

I grew because of them.

If you’re in a season right now where you feel like you’re in over your head…

Like you don’t know what you’re doing…

Like you’ve been thrown into something you weren’t fully prepared for…

Let me tell you something I had to learn the hard way:

You don’t have to have it all figured out to grow into it.

But you do have to stay in it long enough to become who it’s calling you to be.

That season stretched me.

It broke me a little.

It grew me a lot.

And it showed me exactly why I do what I do.

As a leader.
As a woman.
As a mother.

Because becoming isn’t about having all the answers.

It’s about building them in real time.

Together.